A Conversation Every Parent Needs To Have

Recently I came across a post in my news feed on FB which I thought I needed to share. The poster was thoughtful and deliberate in their reasoning. The complete title of the post is, “A conversation EVERY parent needs to have with THEIR-SELF and then their child.” The caps are not mine. Here is the letter:

My son asked if he could walk out in protest today…here’s how the conversation went…
Son: is it ok if I protest on Wednesday? 
Me: protest what? Why would you do that?
Son: protests initiate change; they bring awareness to the issue
Me: yes, like what…
Son: like civil rights; people had to protest for the right to vote, etc (he went on)
Me: that’s true! Protests can be a great catalyst. So what are you protesting? 
Son: gun laws
Me: and what are the current gun laws?
Son: I don’t know, but they need to change
Me: how do you know that if you don’t know what they are? Who makes the gun laws? Whose attention are you trying to get? State, federal, local…?
Son: I don’t know
Me: then no, you may not protest in ignorance. You don’t protest something just bc everyone else is doing it. What is happening in our schools is wrong, and scary, and sad, and yes, some things need to change. But you must educate yourself before you can be an agent of change.
…I’m all about protesting for change, for justice, and being passionate about a cause; I’m not about blindly following the crowd in ignorance…

Being a dyed in the wool liberal, plus a minority, my first instinct was to attack. But as I read through the letter again, ready to comment, I started seeing and grudgingly accepting the merits of her statement. There was middle ground. I ended up saying,

“I don’t think it is ignorant not wanting to be gunned down by a machine gun while you are sitting in a class in school.”

My FB friend and personal friend, who posted the narrative came to the writers defense, gloves off saying,”

I completely agree with that. However you are completely missing the point. While the “subject” of this discussion was gun control, what this really talking about is people blindly following with out getting the real story. The last sentence that is said to the child ” But you must educate yourself before you can be an agent of change.” There is no way anyone especially some one of color can argue this. This is how the equal rights movement works. Educate the ignorant so they see the real truth, not the popular truth, not the hollywood truth, THE REAL TRUTH.
Unfortunately in this case the real truth is if we as law abiding citizens would get off our collective asses an DEMAND that the existing gun laws be enforced to the fullest letter of the law no matter if it locks up a Presidents son, a white welder a black college professor or our own children, we would not have any where near th number of issues we have.
Then we can discuss new laws. But let’s enforce the ones we have first.

Me, not being one to back down from an intellectual argument, fired back…

Hmm… let’s enforce those laws and build on them by banning military style automatic weapons. That’s what the kids want. Heck that’s what most Americans want. Let’s not have a philosophical discussion on the the nature of fire while the house is burning down. Let that boy go out there to help put it out.

My ego now satisfied with what I thought was witty, but still able to put my argument in perspective, I set back, feet up and licked my wounds. Both of these people had a valid and strong position. I no sooner overcame my predjudices, when a third comment appeared from another reader.

I agree, but the father could help the child do research on current gun laws and then allow him/her to make a decision. Of course, many of the current gun laws are not adhered to for the most part. I don’t know every single gun law, but I personally know there needs to be a change. You don’t have to be fully educated on the laws to know, see and hear changes need to happen to keep children safe in schools, without the worry of an active shooter scenario or worry over an active shooter. I believe some students did their homework on current gun laws, but most did not. But, they were also reminding us that their lives are more important than guns and a reminder that young people will be able to vote one day and then they can use their vote and voices to make changes. It believe it is a great lesson of involving them in future interest of politics and how important their vote will be. I also believe they are learning the uniqueness of free speech and their right to be safe in their place of learning. Let children, who are of age, think for themselves. Just because momma and daddy didn’t march doesn’t mean it is wrong. Of course, that is my opinion and I do respect yours. That’s what makes America great, our differences and willingness to work together for change.

These three points stuck out to me. They seem to represent the author’s idea’s.

1. I’m all about protesting for change, for justice, and being passionate about a cause; I’m not about blindly following the crowd in ignorance… 
2. You must educate yourself before you can be an agent of change.”
3. That’s what makes America great, our differences and willingness to work together for change.

But we don’t have to be experts on a subject to be against it. I’m not an expert on the Holocaust, but I am definitely against people be murdered in gas chambers. Being an agent of change doesn’t necessarily make a difference, ask President Obama and America has always been great, its just a human weakness to think that the grass is greener on the other side. These people and millions of others like them, that keep the conversation going, are the people that are going to put the fire out. Want to help? Join us in the comment section.